Fear Doesn't Discriminate. Growth Doesn't Either.

Assert

Open the diary. See "presentation". Feel your stomach drop before your brain can explain why. The SLT briefing after Ofsted, the panel interview on Teams, the first Governors' update in your new role. You handle your day-to-day with ease, then the context shifts and your body tightens. That's not a character flaw. It's a human response to stepping outside what feels familiar.

Notice

Susan Jeffers documented this decades ago: we are not alone in our fear. It shows up for everyone in new or uncertain situations. The confident colleague who runs staff meetings without notes might still freeze if you ask her to tap dance in front of the same room. The brilliant home cook who feeds a family every night may feel sick at the thought of catering for twenty-five. Same person, different context.

Support

Fear tracks newness, not inadequacy. Experience lowers the risk of nerves, but never makes you immune. Higher stakes, unfamiliar faces, tight timing, poor sleep, perimenopause - any of these can nudge your system into high alert. You still know your material. Your working memory is just busy checking the room for danger.

Weigh

I teach people how to speak with calm confidence. Recently I delivered a presentation on exactly that and blanked. Twice. The problem wasn't my slides - it was how I'd prepared. I'd practised the logic, not the load. I hadn't run it out loud, on my feet, with a human face looking back. I hadn't rehearsed under pressure so my body could recognise the feeling as safe. What helped? A simple reset: pause, long exhale, one sentence I could trust, then continue. No one minded. They were there for value, not perfection.

Except

If fear appears whenever we grow, it's not a stop sign - it's a signpost. You're at the edge of your current capacity, about to expand it. The goal isn't to eliminate fear. That would mean you'd stopped stretching. The goal is to feel the fear without being afraid of the fear itself.

Respond: Make fear manageable, not mythical

Prepare conditions, not just content. Rehearse out loud, standing up, with a timer. If possible, ask one trusted person to sit in. A small rise in heart rate during practice teaches your body the feeling is safe.

Anchor your opening. Practise the first 60–90 seconds until it feels familiar. If you lose your place later, return to that opening line.

Carry a simple reset. Decide in advance what you'll do if you blank: pause, take one long exhale, glance at a cue with your next heading, then say "Let me pick that up from here" and continue.

Lower the perfection pressure. Aim for clear, human, and helpful. Audiences don't need flawless. They need you with them.

Look after the basics. Sleep, hydration, and a proper meal give you more bandwidth on the day.

If a blank happens, keep it simple: pause, breathe out slowly, use your reset line, return to your anchor, carry on. Most rooms are kinder than your inner critic.

The good news? Confidence grows with exposure that feels safe enough. You gain it by showing up, not by waiting for it to magically appear.

if you want a gentle place to start, download my free 5-Minute Pre-Meeting Reset. It helps your body believe it is allowed to speak, so your voice can do its job.